Let’s set the scene.
The year is 180 A.D. You are the leader of one of the greatest powers in the world—the Roman Empire. You have governed through wars and a plague that killed 5-10 million people. You have seen the absolute worst that humanity can endure. With the snap of your figure, you could, if you wanted, have anyone executed for wronging you.
And yet, you don’t.
You not only rule with humility, but you also choose to retain hope for humanity. This was the reality for Marcus Aurelius, the last of the Five Good Emperors.
I recently had a friend ask me if I would write something on humility because she was struggling with the fact that there were certain people in her life (e.g., colleagues, etc.) who were not being humble. We’ve all been in this scenario. You meet someone, they seem nice enough at first, but then you quickly realize that they’re a bit of a know-it-all. Maybe they constantly challenge you or even go so far as belittling you.
It might feel as if this is a uniquely modern issue, especially with the constant pressure to showcase a picture-perfect representation of our lives on social media. People feel important and recognized in ways that didn’t exist in the past. Nothing feeds your ego quite like a bunch of people liking photos of your fancy new car or your vacation to Bali, right?
But the reality is that this is not a modern issue at all. In fact, it’s been going on for millennia, or more likely, for as long as humans have existed.
Marcus Aurelius is most well known for his writing on Stoic philosophy, and in particular, the book Meditations, which is a collection of his personal writings during his tenure as emperor. Here’s how he viewed dealing with people who suck (remember, this is from more than 1,800 years ago):
“When you wake up in the morning, tell yourself: the people I deal with today will be meddling, ungrateful, arrogant, dishonest, jealous and surly. They are like this because they can't tell good from evil. But I have seen the beauty of good, and the ugliness of evil, and have recognized that the wrongdoer has a nature related to my own - not of the same blood and birth, but the same mind, and possessing a share of the divine. And so none of them can hurt me. No one can implicate me in ugliness. Nor can I feel angry at my relative, or hate him. We were born to work together like feet, hands and eyes, like the two rows of teeth, upper and lower. To obstruct each other is unnatural. To feel anger at someone, to turn your back on him: these are unnatural.”
It’s hard to believe that someone with so much power could maintain such a forgiving and merciful attitude like this. He doesn’t blame people for being bad, and he actively chooses not to rebuke them for their behavior. Instead, he focuses on the fact that “the divine” is bigger than himself, and it is his duty—and his duty alone—to help and work with these people.
You might be asking yourself, “So you just expect me to let it slide when someone is an asshole?”
And the simple answer is: yes.
Because it really is that simple. We get to choose how we react to people around us. You can either choose to stoop to their level, or you can understand, like Marcus Aurelius, that no one can implicate you in ugliness.
Choose wisely.
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Let’s set the scene.
The year is 180 A.D. You are the leader of one of the greatest powers in the world—the Roman Empire. You have governed through wars and a plague that killed 5-10 million people. You have seen the absolute worst that humanity can endure. With the snap of your figure, you could, if you wanted, have anyone executed for wronging you.
And yet, you don’t.
You not only rule with humility, but you also choose to retain hope for humanity. This was the reality for Marcus Aurelius, the last of the Five Good Emperors.
I recently had a friend ask me if I would write something on humility because she was struggling with the fact that there were certain people in her life (e.g., colleagues, etc.) who were not being humble. We’ve all been in this scenario. You meet someone, they seem nice enough at first, but then you quickly realize that they’re a bit of a know-it-all. Maybe they constantly challenge you or even go so far as belittling you.
It might feel as if this is a uniquely modern issue, especially with the constant pressure to showcase a picture-perfect representation of our lives on social media. People feel important and recognized in ways that didn’t exist in the past. Nothing feeds your ego quite like a bunch of people liking photos of your fancy new car or your vacation to Bali, right?
But the reality is that this is not a modern issue at all. In fact, it’s been going on for millennia, or more likely, for as long as humans have existed.
Marcus Aurelius is most well known for his writing on Stoic philosophy, and in particular, the book Meditations, which is a collection of his personal writings during his tenure as emperor. Here’s how he viewed dealing with people who suck (remember, this is from more than 1,800 years ago):
“When you wake up in the morning, tell yourself: the people I deal with today will be meddling, ungrateful, arrogant, dishonest, jealous and surly. They are like this because they can't tell good from evil. But I have seen the beauty of good, and the ugliness of evil, and have recognized that the wrongdoer has a nature related to my own - not of the same blood and birth, but the same mind, and possessing a share of the divine. And so none of them can hurt me. No one can implicate me in ugliness. Nor can I feel angry at my relative, or hate him. We were born to work together like feet, hands and eyes, like the two rows of teeth, upper and lower. To obstruct each other is unnatural. To feel anger at someone, to turn your back on him: these are unnatural.”
It’s hard to believe that someone with so much power could maintain such a forgiving and merciful attitude like this. He doesn’t blame people for being bad, and he actively chooses not to rebuke them for their behavior. Instead, he focuses on the fact that “the divine” is bigger than himself, and it is his duty—and his duty alone—to help and work with these people.
You might be asking yourself, “So you just expect me to let it slide when someone is an asshole?”
And the simple answer is: yes.
Because it really is that simple. We get to choose how we react to people around us. You can either choose to stoop to their level, or you can understand, like Marcus Aurelius, that no one can implicate you in ugliness.
Choose wisely.
