In preparation for my first trip to France in a month, I decided to pick up Julia Child’s book titled My Life In France.
For those who don’t know Julia Child, she was a famous chef, cooking teacher, author, and television personality who revolutionized American cuisine through her television programs and cookbooks. I decided to read this book because I wanted to get the perspective of an American who fully embraced French culture during her time spent abroad.
After about a year living in France, at the age of 37, she made an important realization about herself. She explains:
“Upon reflection, I decided I had three main weaknesses: I was confused (evidenced by a lack of facts, an inability to coordinate my thoughts, and an inability to verbalize my ideas); I had a lack of confidence, which caused me to back down from forcefully stated positions; and I was overly emotional at the expense of careful, scientific thought. I was thirty-seven years old and still discovering who I was.”
Despite this having nothing to do with cooking, it stood out to me because I—and I’m sure many other people—often feel this way. In fact, just yesterday I was talking with a friend and had nearly this exact same realization about myself, especially the part about having an inability to verbalize ideas and a lack of confidence to state my positions assertively.
When I’m writing, I have time to sort through my thoughts and opinions. I can take the necessary time to craft what I want to say. But when I’m speaking with someone about complex or emotionally charged topics, such as politics or philosophy, I often falter and end up taking a “safe” position. In the past, I’ve told myself that I’m just being moderate. But in reality, I am shying away from taking a strong position because I don’t feel like I have the self-assurance or mental dexterity to defend that position.
I see my moderate temperament as being a virtue. It takes a significant amount of empathy and patience to understand both sides of an issue, which most people don’t have. But as I get older, I have started to understand that there’s a difference between being moderate and being avoidant. In other words, I have to ask myself: do I really understand both sides, or am I in reality failing to understand either side?
Perhaps this is just a part of my nature and who I am as a person. Maybe I will never have strongly-held opinions about certain topics like politics. But I do hope that at a certain point, I am able to speak with a clarity and conviction about the things that I really do care about, whatever they may be.
And more importantly, we have time to figure these things out. I find it interesting how at age 37 Julia was discovering these things about herself. Around that same time, she had also just started taking her first French cooking classes. I find it both inspiring and impressive that she was nearly 40 years old when she started doing the thing that she would eventually become famous for. And I have a feeling that by finding this passion for cooking, it helped her discover things about herself in other ways too.
Self-reflection, self-learning, and self-improvement are lifelong tasks. Don’t stop.
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In preparation for my first trip to France in a month, I decided to pick up Julia Child’s book titled My Life In France.
For those who don’t know Julia Child, she was a famous chef, cooking teacher, author, and television personality who revolutionized American cuisine through her television programs and cookbooks. I decided to read this book because I wanted to get the perspective of an American who fully embraced French culture during her time spent abroad.
After about a year living in France, at the age of 37, she made an important realization about herself. She explains:
“Upon reflection, I decided I had three main weaknesses: I was confused (evidenced by a lack of facts, an inability to coordinate my thoughts, and an inability to verbalize my ideas); I had a lack of confidence, which caused me to back down from forcefully stated positions; and I was overly emotional at the expense of careful, scientific thought. I was thirty-seven years old and still discovering who I was.”
Despite this having nothing to do with cooking, it stood out to me because I—and I’m sure many other people—often feel this way. In fact, just yesterday I was talking with a friend and had nearly this exact same realization about myself, especially the part about having an inability to verbalize ideas and a lack of confidence to state my positions assertively.
When I’m writing, I have time to sort through my thoughts and opinions. I can take the necessary time to craft what I want to say. But when I’m speaking with someone about complex or emotionally charged topics, such as politics or philosophy, I often falter and end up taking a “safe” position. In the past, I’ve told myself that I’m just being moderate. But in reality, I am shying away from taking a strong position because I don’t feel like I have the self-assurance or mental dexterity to defend that position.
I see my moderate temperament as being a virtue. It takes a significant amount of empathy and patience to understand both sides of an issue, which most people don’t have. But as I get older, I have started to understand that there’s a difference between being moderate and being avoidant. In other words, I have to ask myself: do I really understand both sides, or am I in reality failing to understand either side?
Perhaps this is just a part of my nature and who I am as a person. Maybe I will never have strongly-held opinions about certain topics like politics. But I do hope that at a certain point, I am able to speak with a clarity and conviction about the things that I really do care about, whatever they may be.
And more importantly, we have time to figure these things out. I find it interesting how at age 37 Julia was discovering these things about herself. Around that same time, she had also just started taking her first French cooking classes. I find it both inspiring and impressive that she was nearly 40 years old when she started doing the thing that she would eventually become famous for. And I have a feeling that by finding this passion for cooking, it helped her discover things about herself in other ways too.
Self-reflection, self-learning, and self-improvement are lifelong tasks. Don’t stop.
